Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
