Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
