So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
