What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
