Moan for me like Helen Keller
I hope mine doesn't look like that
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
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