I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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