WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize