Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
