I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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