I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
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