Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
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