Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
Randomize
