Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize
