what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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