guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Randomize
