Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize