well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
