I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Randomize
