we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
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