you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Your cock deserves a montage
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
