Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
