My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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