Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Randomize
