To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Randomize
