i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
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