As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Randomize
