I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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