I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I informed him that we had less than 5 minutes left to live, and his first words were "I'm trying to think of a good They Might Be Giants quip"
Randomize
