VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Randomize
