but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
