i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Randomize
