They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
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