careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Less talking, more tequila
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I am one with the molecules
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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