So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Randomize
