You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
