ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
