i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
