was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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