Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
