thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
