even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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