Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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