No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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