I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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