my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
