ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
