haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Randomize
