Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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