whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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