there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
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